When your features match the ethnicity you relate to, but your skin color does not..

I’m mostly Irish & German w/a little African & Spanish. My dark eyes & skin tone comes from my father, my mother is pure ivory w/milky white skin & blonde hair. I grew up in the 80’s & early 90’s, one thing I’ve learned when your looks stand out a little in an all-white neighborhood is that kids are just mean! My sister (pictured above) & I were vilified by bullies, we were called the ‘N’ word constantly & occasionally rocks were thrown at us. My sister was older & took the brunt of it, not only was the ‘N’ word spewed at her daily her nickname was Jimi Hendrix (she’s honored now, of course, he was an amazing musician)! My older brother married young, to a mixed-race girl whose large extended family from Ghana on her mother’s side became a part of our family. It’s one culture that is a part of & in me, which I relate to & who I am.

Sometimes it feels odd having it a part of me & my skin color not exactly matching. Meaning that there are certain things you can’t do or say as a white person around African American people, which is appropriate. But, sometimes I forget & get myself into trouble….For instance, Grace who was an African woman (she passed) who was a part of my family who I sometimes referred to her as Nelson Mandela, because she actually looked like him (now this is w/African American groups I’m around other than my family). And if I use hip-hop slang I can just feel the thought “Yeah whatcha know about it, white girl? Shut yo mouth!” around me. Now, I am not complaining that I have to suppress myself, I do it out of respect. But, it just feels weird & unnatural sometimes.

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